I know it's been a while. And I could say all the typical things about how life has been with a newborn. And it's mostly all true.
Sleep is still hard to come by ... I'm usually a sweaty mess from breastfeeding ... I haven't worn anything beyond boy t-shirts and pyjama shorts for almost a month, and my hair has been up in a clip 24 hours a day.
... but nights are getting easier. I'm not as worried (knocks wood), and I'm able to let myself sleep while he sleeps while the AngelCare flicks away letting me know he's breathing ...still living... still here to stay.
(Although I still doubt that machine... and on my not so good nights I have lead myself to believe that it's flawed... it'll flick and tick even if the baby died. So I'm up, peeking into his crib [that is RIGHT NEXT TO OUR BED] watching the rise and fall of his chest.)
He's 23 days old today. And I guess he's technically not a newborn any longer (HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?!?!) His weight has FINALLY picked up. The bilirubin is still in his blood, and he's still looking a little jaundice... and for the first few weeks, he wasn't putting on weight - even though I was feeding on demand (with no more than 3 hours in between feeds), and his pee's and poo's were normal.
Here is the breakdown:
Born April 23 - 7lbs 5oz
Discharged @ 2 days old - April 25 - 6lbs 11oz
4 days old - April 27 - 6lbs 13oz
6 days old - April 29 - 6lbs 10oz (YIKES!)
9 days old - May 2 - 6lbs 14oz
17 days old - May 10 - 7lbs 4oz
Just last week, he still wasn't at his birth weight. His doctor told me that with jaundice babies it's normal for them to take a little more time to put the pounds back on.. but still. I wasn't a happy camper.
I've had a few meltdowns while feeding him ... convinced he wasn't actually drinking. He's very lethargic at the breast, and as he would nod off even while I'd tickle his ear, blow on his face, stroke his chin, etc... I shed a few tears.
While we were waiting to be called in at the doctors office today .. the nurse came out and called, "Alexander". Daniel and I both shifted our weight to get up, and we stopped and looked at each other. Oops. Ouch.
A little blonde haired boy and his mom made their way into a little room.
I'm still in a bit of a double life. One here with Theo, and one in my heart where my boy made it home after a perfect pregnancy last year, and nurses call his name in doctor's offices.
But alas, today Theodore weighed in at 7lbs 13oz today! 9 ounces in one week! Go Theo!
Alexander's birth weight was 7lbs 13oz. I held Theodore extra close today ... almost feeling like it was my chance to feel his brother's weight here on earth.
Once again, in not knowing how else to end this post (still a little tired, still a little scattered, still a little tight on time) I'll just slam a bunch of Theodore pix your way!
In no order, with no rhyme or reason.. he's my kid.
He falls asleep on me all-the-time. He's the perfect handful
Chilling out with his Dad ...
... watching the Leafs (this wasn't them watching the major upset of a game where they lost in game 7 to Boston!!)
Here's some of his newborn smooshiness - a smile
... looking like a worried old man
loving some skin to skin
silly dream face
just a few days old - cheeks looking chubbier than ever
He is a super sleeper during the day!
2 weeks old!
spending time with mom and dad
the nights can be long...
and we usually end up like this
But here's the little guy yesterday... still a little yellow in his eyes, and looking like he just got back from somewhere warm and sunny
Weighing in... 7lbs 13oz :)
Daniel told me that people aren't going to think he's cute because pictures don't capture his adorableness. I'll admit - he's a funny looking kid! But really guys, pictures don't do him justice. I could seriously eat him up, he's so yummy.